God, who foresaw your tribulation, has specially armed you to go through it, not without pain but without stain.

C. S. Lewis

No matter how deeply I want to go through this journey unscathed, it will not be the case. There are times when I feel pressed on all sides: anger from one, resentment from another. There is stress looking me in the eyes and worries like a shadow continually behind me.

My soul thirsts for a peacefulness. A calm of the waters. I feel it calling deep from within my chest. But it doesn’t come. My thirst is left unquenched.

Yet God, simultaneously, even amidst my struggle, calls me deeper. Further into the the darkness and into the pain. In this place which seems so far from everyone, He shows me His hands. He shows me His side. He doesn’t speak. He just gazes. His eyes are reddened. His face encompassing both suffering and love. And in that moment, I know that I can keep going.

That all will be well.

That all will be well.

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